Christmas

because it is a time for reflecting,

and forgiving,

and moving on.

Angel

the delights and sorrows of living in fantasy

lección de vida

NO VUELVO A DEJAR QUE NADIE SE APROVECHE DE MI

i wish

I wish time gives me the answers I need.
and it gives you whatever you want.

nada particular

vuelo herido y no se a dónde ir,

con la rabia cansada de andar.

Miguel Bosé- Nada Particular.

assertiveness

assertiveness: Tendency towards assertion or self-assertion.
self-assertion: insistence on a recognition of one's own rights or claims.
OED.

I am sorry, I need time to work on this.

monitor (2)

esperando respuesta veo que hoy tu ausencia llega nada más

las cosas deben de seguir

y no sabemos si será.

(Volován, Monitor)

come to the edge!

Come to the edge.
We might fall.
Come to the edge.
It’s too high!
COME TO THE EDGE!
And they came,
and he pushed,
and they flew.

Cristopher Logue.

el sitio de mi recreo

donde nos llevó la imaginación...

Miguel Bosé.

huevos

dicen que no hay que poner todos los huevos en la misma canasta. a mí no me importa, yo lo hago. toda la vida lo he hecho. y lo seguiré haciendo.

Maitia, nun zira?

Nik etzutut ikusten

Ez berririk jakiten

Nurat galdu zira?

Kepa Junkera.

what a beautiful song!

English language

I am starting a project. A Word Project. These are some of the words I love:
-saucer
-duvet
-mumble

(to be honest, I am just in love with the word "saucer" these days. I had forgotten I know that word and I want to say it again and again. saucer.)

running with scissors

... and I thought my life was weird.

"I want rules... and boundaries... because... what I've learned is that... without them... all life is... is a series of surprises", Augusten Burroughs.

bike

“Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving”. A. Einstein

OCD

the nature of my OCD is the extreme anxiety that not having control over things (and especially the future) causes me.


but these days

I am learning

that some twists in life

are

actually good.

yegua

éramos salvajes

sin frenos para el amor

y la misma fantasía

se fundía y se reía de los dos

babasónicos

disclaimer

http://xkcd.com/15/

I have found a new pleasure in life

have I been wrong all this time?

"If female, you are not attracted to men who are kind, stable, reliable, and interested in you. You find such nice men boring".

from Norwood, Women Who Love Too Much.

http://www.ta-tutor.com/webpdf/ram167.pdf

thank you, Helen Fisher

"...and they would say yes as if I had asked them to pass the salt".

changed around the words that you said to suit me fine

I can explain..
I know it happened again,
It's manic.
I'm standing in the flame,
trying to fan it
(it will be out gone soon).

Faithless

ni todo el amor ni todo el dinero

oh, ¡qué buen dicho!

putting my sword down

I have always said that giving up is sometimes braver than continuing fighting. There are battles that are not worth the effort, but we don´t know until we have come this far. I think I have come this far to realise that there is no point in trying any further.

I give up. I put my sword down, with my head up high.

the men who stare at goats

high on love

Dopamine.

It plays a key role in behaviour, cognition, voluntary movement, motivation and reward, sleep, mood, attention, creative thinking, and learning. It is "commonly associated with the pleasure system of the brain, providing feelings of enjoyment and reinforcement to motivate a person proactively to perform certain activities". (wikipedia.org)

the princess and the warrior

I felt that if a person wasn't alone,
they might be able to find happiness in the outside world...

what planet do you come from anyway?

Egyptian view of the heart

"If it wandered - and it might - it was important to persuade it back into position: a heart in its place denoted good health". Young, L. The Book of the Heart, p.6.

nobody does it better

makes me feel sad for the rest
nobody does it quite as good as you
baby, you are the best.

(and I sing it in Radiohead style, not Carly Simon)

being for the benefit of Mr. Kite

there will be a show tonight on trampoline.

(The Beatles)

autumn arrived too soon

the interpreter

the truth needs no translation.

a heart that is full up like a landfield

no alarms and no surprises

(Radiohead)

injusticias

¿por qué todos los libros y películas y artículos sobre relaciones interpersonales, y especialmente las románticas, dan reglas a las mujeres sobre qué hacer?
no lo llames, no lo busques, no seas pushy, no hagas notar que quieres un compromiso, espera, sigue tu vida, se paciente, no te preocupes, se cab¨ona, no hagas un drama, no le preguntes qué le pasa, no le reclames nada, no le muestres tus sentimientos a la primera, etc etc etc.
Todos están basados en lo mismo: esta es la gran verdad y la mujer se debe atener a eso o quedarse sola de por vida. Ni modo, m´ijita, así es la realidad.

¿y qué reglas hay para el otro lado?

(qué fastidio)

ordinary life

"and I show you my sins, you show me all your scars
as we settle in, it´s written in the stars",
Kristen Barry

an education

well, I do go to Oxford

but I am still the kind of girl who would fall for this kind of thing.

chasing cars

if I lay here,
if I just lay here,
Would you lie with me and just forget the world?
(Snow Patrol)

the imaginarium of doctor parnassus

Can you put a price on your dreams?

caigo al abismo que el presente nos depara

es que me mata tu ausencia
y haberte querido tanto
porque el recuerdo no es real.

Mareo, Babasónicos.

torn

I am torn between Monterrey-Conservatism and Modernity.

the blower´s daughter

did I say that I loathe you?

did I say that I want to leave it all behind?

...I can´t take my mind off you

(Damien Rice)

otro de Mario

Eras, sí, pero ahora suenas un poco a mí.
Era, sí, pero ahora tengo un poco de ti.
No demasiado, solamente un toque,
acaso un leve rasgo familiar,
pero que fuerce a todos
a abarcarnos a ti y a mí cuando nos piensen solos.

(Extracto, Asunción de Ti, Mario Benedetti)

viceversa

Como dijo Mario:
Tengo miedo de verte, necesidad de verte, esperanza de verte, desazones de verte.
Tengo ganas de hallarte, preocupación de hallarte, certidumbre de hallarte, pobres dudas de hallarte.
Tengo urgencia de oirte alegría de oirte, buena suerte de oirte y temores de oirte.
O sea,
resumiendo,

estoy jodido

y radiante.

Quizá más lo primero que lo segundo
y también viceversa.
Mario Benedetti.

mujeres al borde de un ataque de nervios

Pepa: that lady is dangerous.

Cab-driver: No lady's dangerous if you know how to handle her.

¿por qué el pollo cruzó el camino?

Para pagar su cuota a Cadereyta.

(a ver si me la publican)

hacer por hacer

no se si hacer

o más bien deshacer

si hacerlo mal

o hacerlo bien

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NKQuheocmH0

y la distancia le ganó al amor

nos hablamos pero no sabemos si será.

(Volovan, Monitor)

nunca se

si voy o regreso o de dónde vengo

multiple choice

¿por qué siempre se amontonan?

¿y por qué siempre se les ocurre regresar al mismo tiempo?

otra vez el viento

si sólo puede ir mejor

y está cerca el momento

espera que sople el viento a favor.

(Búnbury)

how am I supposed to live without you?

there is a song that makes me smile, that fills my heart with a special kind of joy and good memories. Today I came across the first song in English language that I learned. I remember the classroom (it was one of those upstairs, attached to the main building), the teacher, my classmates, it was 1988. It has been always there, in the background, holding a special place.

"and I don´t wanna know the price I´m gonna pay for dreaming"

as good as it gets

I have got a lot of issues and manias and anxieties and hoarding and hell-a-lot-of intrusive thoughts and panic attacks and rushing thoughts and conflicting ideas and etc etc etc

but perhaps this is as good as it gets,

and i´ve got to embrace it.

you don´t have to say you love me

just be close at hand.

manos al aire

Y yo no tengo armas para enfrentarte.

Pongo mis manos, manos al aire.

Sólo me importa amarte en cuerpo y alma como era ayer
(Nelly Furtado)

encomio

Hoy la RAE me enseñó una palabra. encomio: alabanza encarecida.

El esposo encontrado por la esposa. (...) La esposa: Bajé a la huerta de nogales, a mirar las flores del valle, a ver si las parras ya habían echado retoños, si los granados estaban en flor. Sin darme cuenta me puso la fantasía en una carroza, al lado de mi príncipe.
Cantar de los Cantares, Sección Quinta. Encomio de la Esposa.

too late?

what to do when you´ve done everything wrong?

in full gallop

sorry, back to the stables

the ugly truth

... is that there are no rules!!

grito desesperado

ahora entiendo por qué la gente dice: Dios Mío, dame paciencia!!!!

living costs

UK: lime: 35 pence each.
MX: lime: 4 pence a kilo.
Being at Home, Family and Friends, Priceless.

reading signs floating in the air

to what extent could we stretch life so it fits the signs?

or is it the other way around?

on transit

from 83/85 to 22 to 129 to 22. in 6 weeks.

welcome to adulthood

my adultez llegó con la entrada al mercado privado de la renta de casas.

on growing up

lately,

I have

been

juggling

with

life.

on moving, the sequel

... maybe it is just a matter of being patient and putting a bit of effort until you find The One you truly like.

PUAs

There is a horrible weird mean nasty world out there. A world that I have been protected of.
About a month ago, I was approached by this guy who was supposedly amazed and wowed by me; it all seemed a fairy tale and a great Hollywood-style love story.
(http://resulta.blogspot.com/2009/06/summer-is-back.html)

Today, I was walking around town, and in a different spot, the same guy approached me again. This is pretty much the conversation:
Him: hi, this may sound random but....
Me: hey, hello... yeah, we´ve met before.
Him: ah? really? have we?
Me: yes, you are T. We have met before. You don´t remember me, do you?
Him: ahh... ah yes, true....
Me: yeap, you are T., T. ____.
Him: ah? wow, you must have a very good memory then.
Me: yes I have a good memory, you talked to me the other day on the road.
Him: really?
Me: yes, and you sent me an email. your email is ______@____.com.
Him: ah... uh.. ah... anyway... ah...
Me: you were not expecting this, were you?
Him: ah...mmh...
Me: You look scared, you are scared aren´t you?
Him: well, ah.. uh...
Me: well, be careful with who you talk to on the road.... you never know who you may encounter, there is a lot of weird people in Oxford, be careful. Or who knows? Maybe we are meant to keep running into each other...
Him: yeah, true, well, anyway, I was going to have lunch now...
Me: yeap, have lunch. good bye!

So. Last month, when I received an email from this guy, the first thing I obviously did was to google his email. Ta-da! It appeared in a forum that involved the word PUA. PUA, what the hell is that?!?! So I conducted the respective research and PUA is the short for Pick-Up-Artist. ... Go ahead, you can search and decide for yourself. After learning about this PUA-world, I never replied to his email.

I am up for fairy tales. real ones. amazing ones. fantastic ones. Not that kind of blsht.

It requires way more than that to wow me.

(at least you´ve gotta be more clever than that)

moving

I wonder to what extent...
finding a house is like finding a partner and finding a partner is like finding a house and finding a house is like finding a partner and finding a partner is like finding a house and finding a house is like finding a partner and finding a partner is like finding a house and finding a house is like finding a partner and finding a partner is like finding a house and finding a house is like finding a partner and finding a partner is like finding a house and finding a house is like finding a partner and finding a partner is like finding a house and finding a house is like finding a partner and finding a partner is like finding a house and finding a house is like finding a partner and finding a partner is like finding a house and finding a house is like finding a partner and finding a partner is like finding a house and finding a house is like finding a partner and finding a partner is like finding a house and finding a house is like finding a partner and finding a partner is like finding a house.

pop

I was supposed to be in MJ´s concert today.

I guess that was truly it.

blatantly, life

I am not sure I am brave enough.

ahora ya ves

he dejado de hablar con las paredes, de repetir tu nombre. He dejado de perderme en los bares, de buscarte en la noche, de rendirme al amanecer. He dejado de pensar si algun día
tal vez si tú quisieras
... tal vez.
he dejado a un lado mis hazañas, ahora cuido las palabras, lo que hago y lo que siento.
he dejado de esperar eternamente.
tal vez lo que ha pasado sea para mejor...
tal vez.

Olga Román

my wild horses

Who's gonna ride your wild horses?

Who's gonna tame the heart of thee?

U2.

Perseids

"look at the stars, look how they shine for you".
(Coldplay, Yellow)

torn country

Mexico:
torn between economic growth and constant poverty
between people who honestly want to improve things and corruption
between the puppet-masters and daily life
entrenched in a system that penetrates society in a way
that rottens people
scars the soul
and kills illusions.
an impenetrable network that goes beyond the action of any political party
or the goodwill of any individual.
Mexico, a country torn between idealists and crude reality.

t-2

In 2 weeks time, I will be on my way back to Mexico.

can´t wait.

but it is also sad that I will be leaving my room,

the house in which I have lived for 14 months now.

never thought that I would grow fond of it, but I will miss it.

oh well, time for moving on.

nosotros

atiéndeme

quiero decirte algo

que quizás no esperes

doloroso tal vez

(entre todas las versiones, una de las mejores que he escuchado es Joaquín Sabina y Chavela Vargas)

camila

guardé mis libros y después de cenar
saqué mi zapato y me puse a pensar
que he sido bueno y que puedo confiar
tendré lo que pida esta Navidad.

pensé en el barco y los muñecos cambiar

por un armadillo

y el bicho infernal.

(A ver si para Diciembre

se decide el Bicho Infernal)

Fobia, Camila.

amar y vivir

un cielo gris, lluvia constante e interminable y Bebo y Cigala:

se vive solamente una vez
hay que aprender a querer y a reír,
hay que saber que la vida
se aleja y nos deja llorando quimeras.
¡ay! no quiero arrepentirme después
de lo que pudo haber sido y no fue
y quiero gozar de esta vida...

karma police

I´ve given all I can. It´s not enough. I´ve given all I can.
(Radiohead)

send in the clowns

Isn't it rich? Are we a pair? Me here at last on the ground, You in mid-air.

Send in the clowns. Isn't it bliss? Don't you approve?

One who keeps tearing around,

One who can't move.

Where are the clowns?

Send in the clowns.

Just when I'd stopped opening doors, finally knowing

the One that I wanted was Yours.

Making my entrance again with my usual flair, sure of my lines.

No one is there.

... well maybe next year

(Frank Sinatra)

human complexity

maybe, just maybe, we are so used to getting sh^t that when we receive love we don´t know how to deal with it.

repito:

Por lo pronto, dejo a Dios las cosas de Dios, al Destino las cosas del Destino, a los Humanos las cosas de Humanos
y Yo me dedico a hacer lo Mío.

10 años!!

... fin de BI / inicio LRI.

para celebrar:

I´m on time, on time, on time, on time

to find my way to go for you.

Sussie 4.

(tu tu tu tu tu tu tu tu tu tu tu)

going with the flow

I allowed myself to copy-paste the following, reference at the end:

"I was flying my hawk yesterday. Watching her swoop down in the evening half-light is like a dream.
Sat is a Harris Hawk, majestic and strong. After lovingly raising and training her, she knows to come when I call; I am her source of food and protection. I let her go, then I whistle for her to return. Yesterday, as she was about to take off on her journey back to the glove, a strong wind came up between us. She’s hungry; she wants to fly to the glove, but the wind is very strong. I watched, as Sat took off into the air, her focus never straying from the glove. The wind takes her right off in the opposite direction, but to my surprise, she doesn’t fight against it. She just goes with the wind. She never loses sight of her goal, but she doesn’t have an attachment to how she’s going to get there. She’s willing to flow. She soars majestically with the current, riding the ever-shifting breeze. She waits calmly for the wind to change, and when it does, she returns to me, and claims her prize.

This scene struck me as a perfect illustration of the wisdom of nature. Nature flows. As humans, we have lost this ability. We cling to the idea of what we want, and fight against the current of life, because our ideas are so rigid that we’re not open to let go. No wonder we’re not always in joy, not always in peace; we’re fighting against our present reality.
We all have wings, but if we fight against the wind, we cannot fly. We can’t experience the full magnitude of who we are. We all have unlimited potential, but when we cling to our fears and limitations, we’re not open to experience life in its fullness. Life is an experience. That’s all it is. Embrace your human experience, in all its colors, in all its complexities; in its ever-changing currents. The more you flow, and choose for the joy that is present in every moment, the greater your creation will be. Choose for love, and you will find the true majesty of self.

Isha is an internationally renowned spiritual teacher and author, and the founder of the Isha Foundation Educating for Peace. Her latest book and movie, Why Walk When You Can Fly? explains her system for self-love and the expansion of consciousness. Learn more at http://www.isha.com/. "

http://www.care2.com/greenliving/going-with-the-flow.html

i didn´t know

I knew I was a DPhil student.

Was never told

that I would be an Octopus as well.